Musings: On the Blame Game and Current Politics of India

By Paranoid Android

A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool – Willu (of the Shakespeare variety {its not rude to call him willu, he doesn’t really care about names})

So this one day, God and her son went to play golf (does god exist, is he fallible, and why did he make these?) Now God’s son went first, hit a shot, then another, hit a tree and ended up with a bogey, and was pretty happy with his efforts.

God went next: she shot the ball straight into a fairly large forest, but by an incredible coincidence (improbability factor of 2276 : 1 against), it started pouring cats and dogs and spiders (Watch video here and try sleeping now). Now, the ball starts floating all the way up to the fairway, where a bird shows up (Also, pigeons are a bit off/weird ). This bird picks up the ball and deposits it very close to the hole, where a gust ensures a hole in one.

So God’s son, despite his knowledge of who he is playing against, and how the wind, the rain and even the pigeon follow her every command; rails against her, “do you want to fuck around,”  he asks her, “or do you want to play golf?”

Now, after reading a few hundred something words, you must be wondering if I am ever going to get to any point.

The thing is, this is exactly how I feel about the present political scenario in India. Is it ever going to get to the point?

First we have Rahul Gandhi, forget the funny videos , and forget the constant random conversations. Forget the comically absurd media portrayals about someone who is almost guaranteed to lead this country at some point.

I think it’s all an act, I think; nay, I am convinced he is smarter than all of us. This is mainly because we are so convinced, so happy to anoint someone a fool, that we have blinded ourselves to everything else Gandhi does. In fact the next time you are turned on, remember: its politics. Not the girl next door.

We have allowed Rahul Gandhi, the next inline to the country’s throne to convince us he has no power. If you think we are a democracy, think of this: even the UAE hasn’t had one family rule them as long as we’ve had. We are so keen to laugh at him that no one is calling him out on the absurdity of his message.

He has spent the past one-year claiming to be the change we’ve been waiting for. It almost makes you wish he had known someone in power, or had a family member put him in touch with one of our leaders so he could make change of sorts.  Ironic much? Think about this for a second: how absurd is it that Rahul Gandhi claims he wants to ‘change the system’. It’s like me claiming I don’t love Rosie from the Jetsons.

There are also rumors that Sonia Gandhi doesn’t feel so ‘Indian’ (true or not, I’m fairly certain we’ve been harmed as much by people who are Indian than by people who are not). It seems moot to discus the above or make any comment about a random pointless thing (yes I’ve read my blog, I get the irony).

What I am convinced about however is that Rahul Gandhi is Indian. I know he is Indian, because he has inculcated the amazing ability all the people from the South Asian continent have: to blame everybody else for everything.

We have Rahul discussing how everything is “destroyed’ , and how he would love to change it, like he is a complete outsider to politics and the past 10 years have nothing to do with him. This would be akin to a pimp discussing the importance of women’s rights.

Not that the other party is exempt from criticism: AAP and Kejriwal have completely lost their shit. I don’t know if his accusations, the ones against Mukesh Ambani, and other such high profile people have any merit (they might well do), but what annoys me is that someone as powerful as Kejriwal spends his energy demeaning and blaming another person. What Kejriwal should be doing, I hope, is changing the system.

Last but not least we have Mr. Modi, someone who has managed to turn this election cycle into a large congress blaming session. He is not entirely wrong; the congress has been in power for over 90% on our time as an independent country, and it is fair to give them over 90% of the blame for where we are today. Why does someone like Modi with multiple, great accomplishments behave like a spurned lover. Listen to this .

The only person who is above all this is of course Prime Minister Singh. He never blames anyone (Of course this is because he doesn’t talk; this was too easy, sorry) Watch this spoof .

To conclude, there is an issue in our part of the world and it goes far beyond this election cycle, it goes beyond these politicians . It is our need to find someone to blame. As a group of people we have become so averse to taking responsibility, any responsibility, that we have convinced ourselves that everything that goes wrong is someone else’s fault. This ability to blame someone else has become like a  super power.

While Gandhi, Kejriwal, and Modi are faces we read about everyday, they are no different from us. They are just people who won the ovarian lottery. They represent our families, our friends and most importantly us. The things we hate, the things we laugh at, their faults – especially their faults – represent our faults. Its time we mature as a race of people.

The Paranoid Android.

P.s. Can someone please explain, this video:  Why? What is he saying? You can find me on twitter @Paranoiddroid42

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